Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Change the channel!

I've come to a conclusion this evening. All of the things I thought I would find difficult when Joe left have been surprisingly easy. I fall asleep fine. I hop out of bed every morning. Cooking. Shopping. No problems.

I've found one situation that still gives me great sadness. Television. I make it through the day perfectly fine doing my own thing. But in the evenings, Joe and I would sit down together and watch our "shows". Pawn Stars on Mondays. Reruns of Two and a Half Men. Tosh.0. Star Trek. So very automatically, at 8pm I switch over to the history channel so *we* can watch Pawn Stars and... *sigh*...there's no we...
Pawn Stars is Joe's favorite show.
Do I watch it?
I don't have to now.
Do I watch it because he cant?
It reminds me of him.
He should be home to watch this with me.

Maybe it means we are seriously boring people. Our evenings are marked by tv shows. But I've found myself watching the most random things, because they aren't *our* usual shows. It makes me miss him less.



Jeannette said...

Ours are marked by internet sites. It's not a bad thing if you did it together. I think I would watch different shows too. *hug* You are doing so well.

HellcatBetty said...

I don't think it means you're boring. It's a routine you share, and that's always kind of sad to leave behind. ((hugs)) You're doing pretty darn well, Sara!

Rachel said...

I will probably do the same thing. And it gives me a little hope on the sleeping and shopping front that it isnt as hard as you thought, whew! you're doing great!!! *kisses for Rigel*

Expat Girl said...

I am the same, the evenings are hard because I finally slow down and wish I had my husband to cuddle with on the sofa with a glass of wine and "our" shows

Kayla said...

BF and didn't watch TV together. In fact, he would ask me to turn it off after I got my hour in before he got home from work. But now, I'm sad because all I have to do is watch TV. It's amazing how much I didn't realize that he kept me busy with other things. I get sad to go home after work and have nothing better to look forward to than NCIS reruns (Tony reminds me of BF.)