Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Week 21

DAY 148

Joe's R&R is so close I can't contain myself. The closer it gets, the harder it is to breathe. We talk about our plans and I feel like I have to stand up and pace because I am just so excited! We're gonna have a BLAST. We have so much planned!

The last week has been pretty exciting too. Patty, aka @mommytaco, came to Colorado Springs to (Scentsy) party with us. It was so much fun. And our party was a great success.

And I went to a luncheon at the University of the Rockies on Tuesday. We're seriously considering me going back to school to get my MA in Psychology. The luncheon was an hour and a half long, 3 hours later I walked out with the admissions application thinking about how I could find the money to go back to school. I miss psychology so much. I loved my undergrad degree. I would love to be in the mix again, studying new theories, making up my own, having someone listen to my opinion because it's AWESOME! LOL, I was very good at psychology as an undergrad. I truly found my passion. And then I could actually get a job using my degree, helping people, honoring my talent, making a difference.

And Joe could leave the Army. He's been seriously talking about that too. But one of us has to be the bread winner. I guess it's my turn. I don't mind. I would be doing something I love. I HATE that he hates his job and we cant do anything about it. I doubt he's a Soldier at heart. He's proud of his path. I'm proud of his choices. But I never thought he was a lifer. He proposed to me, as a lifer, saying that this would be our life for 15+ years. But I never thought he would be in that long. He's been in 5 years so far. And I really think he's done. His contract doesn't end for almost 3 more years. Gives me plenty of time to get a good degree and a viable job.

All in all, I'm doing great. 21 weeks down. It's so hard to believe it's been so long since I've seen Joe. I'm so sad that I have gotten so used to being alone. It's a hard thought to swallow. I don't think about him being gone anymore. I don't think about coming home to an empty house. It's just a fact now. And I'm so afraid that I will have to start all over when his R&R is over. But I have done this for this long, and we'll be fairly close to half way done when he goes back. So I only have to do this again, right? At least, that's what I'm telling myself.

4 comments:

Expat Girl said...

You guys are going to have so much fun, I cant wait to hear all about it! Honestly, the second goodbye sucks but you have to do what you are doing, pick yourself up, stay strong and you are on the homestraight and that donut of misery gets nicer and nicer to look at!

Chantal said...

I went to UCCS, so if you're considering a school in the Springs, keep your eye on that one. It's great!

I understand getting used to deployment... it's only been 6 weeks for me, but I already feel a familiarity and normalcy in it.

Julie the Army Wife said...

Go for it! We have debated me going back to school for something that would equal a great job and then Ben getting out. We have a few years to decide.

How exciting about R&R :)

Kayla said...

YAYYYY! So excited for you!